Oh where, oh where did my baby go?

My baby will be 8 tomorrow!  How could that have happened?  How I have loved mothering this child.  My last little one.  I have found myself savoring every baby moment, every toddler moment, every little boy moment.  When he walks by me I find myself reaching out for a kiss and a hug.  I still pull him up onto my lap to cuddle. I love his little boy smell...even though it isn't nearly as sweet as his little baby smell!  Time moves so quickly.  He starts cub scouts tomorrow.  A day that he has looked forward to as long as he can remember.  Tomorrow he gets to join the big boys and this mother will find herself feeling a little lost as he goes off to join the boys.  I will hold him a little longer tonight, hug him a little tighter, and take a moment to breathe in the last of his "babyness" before he turns 8 tomorrow.

Choosing Faith Over Fear

As many of you know, my husband lost his job last February. He was called back to work in the middle of May through the first of August. During this time he was in Las Vegas....so very far from our family. It was not our favorite experience. But, it wasn't our worst either. When the job was completed he was again laid off and we knew then that it would be final. Really scary stuff for us. You see, my sweetie and I are not a couple of young kids anymore. We are what most of you would consider.....OLD. We have 11 kids, with 5 of those precious souls still at home. Dependent on US. I didn't think this out very well when I was starting out this whole big family thing. I wouldn't have changed anything...just maybe I wouldn't have been so surprised when I realized at 52 that when my 7 year old goes on his mission I will be really, really old! Anyway, we realized that at our advanced age (even though we are both so young looking and full of life and energy, giggle, giggle) we are having to start over financially. A scary feeling. My sweetie was able to find a job driving tractor for my daughter's father in law from October until the end of December. It didn't pay enough to even make our mortgage payment. So we didn't. A first in our marriage. We have always paid our bills and had good credit even though we have never had very much money. Yet always enough to meet our needs. Not the wants so much, just the needs. That in itself is such a blessing but that's for another day. When the tractor job ended at the end of the cotton rooding season, we were without any income for a month. He is now working with a man who asked him to come and work in his used appliance warehouse as a supervisor. Still not paying much. $10.00 an hour to start. Scary. But yet, I am so very grateful that he has work. And work that he enjoys. Work that is right up his alley. Work that is blessing to our family. I have seen a pattern in our 32 years of marriage. Heavenly Father has always provided manna to our family. Right at the time of our need, not a minute sooner, not a minute later, the blessing comes. Not always what I would have arranged if I had been the master planner but just what our family needed for our journey on this earth. Now our house is in foreclosure with an auction date of April 21st. When I received that news it knocked me down for a minute. Well, probably longer than that! But as scary as the thought is of losing our home that we built 10 years ago and have had so many precious and sacred experiences in, I know that I must choose to have faith rather fear. It is a choice. As I read other blogs written by women who have faced experiences that would break your heart and find myself lifted up by their words, their testimonies of the words of the prophets, the words of the Savior, the words of our Father,I say to myself "all is well". These experiences will be for our good. For the good of my children. I want to stay here in this home that is filled with us...our living...our experiences. I want to stay in this ward that is home to me. Sharing my daily life with friends who I love so much. And who know and love me. I pray that we will be able to stay here. But more than anything, I pray that I can face this new adventure with a calm spirit, a joyful spirit. I want my children to experience faith in adversity.

Orson F. Whitney said: "No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience is wasted. It ministers to our education, to the development of such qualities as patience, faith, fortitude and humility. All that we suffer and all that we endure, especially when we endure it patiently, builds up our characters, purifies our hearts, expands our souls, and makes us more tender and charitable, more worthy to be called the children of God...and it is through sorrow and suffering , toil and tribulation, that we gain the education that we came here to acquire and which will make us more like our Father and mother in heaven. "

Oh, how I pray that I might be what Father would have me be.

I LOVE the Young Women in my ward!!!

Last night the YW in our ward were doing a service scavenger hunt. They came knocking on my door after I was already in my pajamas cuddling with my Banner. I opened up the door and there stood a group of young women with their leaders asking if they could do some chores for me. DOES LIFE GET ANY BETTER THAN THIS????? I tried to conceal my excitement so as not to scare them but I wanted to drag them in and lock the door. I thought "I wonder how long I can keep them here before anyone notices they are missing. And is it really felony kidnapping if I claim that they ASKED to come in and help?" I tried to breathe calmly as I looked at their list of chores they needed to accomplish and wondered if they would notice if I penciled in things that were not on the list. With glee I watched as they did my dishes, dusted my family room, vacummed my family room, washed some windows and read a story to Banner. Much to my dismay, it was over too soon. And as fast as these service angels came into my life, they were gone. I wanted to press my face against the window and call "Come back, Come back! I will be good to you. You will love it here. We need more girls!" Instead, I silently thanked Heavenly Father for these precious girls and their leaders and went back to cuddling with my little man. As we settled down he said to me, "Mom, They need to come back tomorrow and clean my room." Oh yes son, they do. And the bathroom.

Each Life That Touches Ours for Good

I have been thinking alot lately about the many blessings in my life and my thoughts are continually turned to the many people in my ward, neighborhood and family that are so dear to me. I am sure that there are many that don't have any idea of how much they have blessed my life in some way. I want to thank all those who have given me a smile and a kind word. You have strengthened me. I found myself humming the hymm "Each Life That Touches Ours for Good" this morning and want to share those words.

Each life that touches ours for good
Reflects thine own great mercy, Lord;
Thou sendest blessings from above
Thru words and deeds of those who love.

What greater gift dost thou bestow,
What greater goodness can we know
Than Christ-like friends, whose gentle ways
Strengthen our faith, enrich our days.

For worthy friends whose lives proclaim
Devotion to the Savior's name,
Who bless our days with peace and love,
We praise thy goodness, Lord, above.

May blessings be upon all who go about touching lives for good. I love you and am grateful for your sweet touch in my life.

My kids are the best!

Yesterday was an especially long Sunday. I didn't get a chance to eat so after staying for tithing settlement with our drop dead gorgeous bishop I was STARVING and TIRED when we got home from church. It was about 6:15 when we got home. I expressed my current level of hunger and fatigue to the kids and Layne and Emily told me to go get my jammies on and lay down and they would fix dinner. THOSE WERE THE SWEETEST WORDS! I literally ran to my room! They fixed dinner and it was so good. Later that evening I could hear dishes clinking in the kitchen and I thought that someone was eating again. They do that alot around here. I went to bed without going back into the kitchen. When i got up at 6:00 a.m. expecting last nights dinner mess to still be waiting for me, I was so surprised to see the kitchen spotless and the floor swept! My sweet Riley cleaned the kitchen for me. LOVE THESE KIDS!!!!!

Dancing!

Ammon and Bethany, and then Ammon and Hannah, are dancing at Danya and Sam's wedding reception. How precious is this!!! Bethany and Hannah are my granddaughters, Ammon's nieces. It sure puts "joy in the journey"!

The Great Escape!

My grandbaby Satchel is heading out for some big adventure. He was caught in the act!

Adam and Susan and kids

I miss these sweets kids so very much. They just moved to Clinton, Missouri a few months ago for Adam's new job.

Bourgeous Grandbabies

Bethany, Colten, and baby Emma. Emma is not to happy with the whole photo shoot experience.

How I love this precious boy!

This is my grandson, Colten. He is so darling! Can you tell that he is brother to Bethany?

Isn't she beautiful? This is my granddaughter, Bethany. She is 6 years old and as angelic as they come!

Cows on the porch?

So, how many of you get to have cows on your porch? Those darn cows keep getting out of the pasture and think they need to play in the yard. They have ate all of my trees that we planted in the yard. I was not happy. But the boys love their cows! Sometimes I will see Sippy (the momma cow) looking in my window. I have cow snot on my windows along with boy goobers!

Banner lost another tooth!

My baby is nearly 8 and is in the process of losing his baby teeth. I am so grateful that Heavenly Father sent me this last child. I would have missed out on so much if we had only had 10 kids. So glad that we kept going!!!!

Eagle Scout in the House

I am so excited that Layne has completed his Eagle. He has worked hard and we are so proud of him.

Where Have I Been?

Wow, where has the time gone? Well, I did have a minor role in the production of Joseph. It was so fun and I actually did dance. I met many new friends and especially loved being in the play with my son Ammon. He did so great learning the music! The summer flew by. Dan was working in Las Vegas until August 12th. It was wonderful to have him home. He was then laid off again. Not so fun. But I am learning to trust my Heavenly Father. I am so grateful for good people in my life who fill me with smiles and hope.

I have to tell the funniest story. Well, it made me laugh. Last saturday I told the kids to help me get the house cleaned up. Layne volunteered to clean the hall bathroom. Great. He's 17. Should be able to handle that. He finished in good time and went on his merry way. I went in there later and noticed that the toilet was filthy at the base. What the heck? Didn't it just get cleaned. The top and inside looked pretty good. Hmmmm. So I grabbed a rag and some clorex clean-up and scrubbed the base and the floor. Man, it was gross. Later i asked layne why he didn't finish cleaning the toilet. He said he did. I asked him about the base and floor. His reply was that it doesn't get dirty down there. "What???", i said. Are you kidding me??? The boys use this bathroom primarily. He told me that pee does not get on that part of the toilet when the boys use the toilet. He informed me that they all pee'd inside the toilet. And he also let me know that if there was pee anywhere outside of the toilet bowl then it was the girls in the family missing the target. I said "Are you kidding me? Seriously!!!!" He is still certain that it is the girls that have poor pee control. I guess Emily and I should be more careful!

Lucy! Lucy! Lucy!

Last friday afternoon,I found out that auditions were that evening for the Queen Creek Performing Arts Center production of "Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat". My son Ammon wanted to audition for the children's chorus so I quickly helped him prepare a mean rendition of "Happy Birthday". As we were practicing, Banner decided that he too wanted to audition for the play. I agreed thinking that maybe he would change his mind once we got there. We arrived at auditions to a room full of people, mostly adults, who seemed to be pretty serious about auditioning. I got the boys signed in, their information paper filled out, and their picture taken. We were waiting for our turn to be called when my friend Suzanne arrived with her daughter. We sat and chatted and she asked if I was going to audition. I laughed and said that I wasn't quite that talented. She assured me that being in the chorus was fun and not too hard and talked me into auditioning. It is a good thing that she wasn't trying to talk me into drinking or something because I obviously cave into peer pressure quite easily! I didn't have a song prepared. Heck, I couldn't even think of a song that I knew the words to! They called our group of 10 in and we were taught a dance. A DANCE!!!! Suzanne failed to tell me that I would have to learn a dance. I am not a dancer. I can barely walk straight. So I giggled, well, I actually laughed right out loud at myself, and proceeded to try and dance. When we actually went in to the room to audition in front of the guys in charge I couldn't stop smiling because I was so entertained with myself trying to sing and dance. I just kept thinking of Lucy. You know, Lucy Ricardo. I have many Lucy moments but I think that this was close to one of my finer Lucy moments. When my group of ladies (about 5 of us)got up to do the dance I just smiled and stumbled my way through the routine thinking that I was surely going to make Ethel proud. Then we had to sing. Remember, I didn't have anything prepared. My Ammon and Banner did so great. I am so glad that I decided to audition so that I could be with them in the room! Then my turn came. The only song that I could come up with on a moments notice was......wait for it....it truly is a classic.....the ever famous and popular.....POPCORN POPPING ON THE APRICOT TREE with all of the actions! I sang in my best Lucy voice with my best Lucy attitude! I must have been amazing because to my great surprise I got a call back for tonight. I got the call saturday night and again, I laughed right out loud. I laughed even harder when I was told that they were calling back for the leads. She also said that I had caught the attention of the production team. By now I was snorting. It is amazing how far you can get with Popcorn Popping with the actions! I went to call backs tonight and just when I thought I couldn't have anymore of a Lucy moment, I managed to have probably the best Lucy moment I have ever had. They taught us this really cute 60's type dance that went really fast and demanded moves that my body just wasn't meant to do! But I did my best and I am sure that I provided much needed entertainment to those that actually had talent and the ability to dance! I was not in the final group that they called up to dance again for them. Whew. I was worried. I am just not sure that my family could spare me if I were to be discovered and have to go share my Lucy dancing with the world!

The ever popular and patient Sam!

My 12 year old Riley. Manhood approaches!

Emily on her 15th birthday.

Riley and his dad at the Christmas band concert, 2008.